This early in the writing, one of the first questions that come up is: When do I give narrative? What do I include?
I gave descriptions of my characters in my first novel, because I didn’t know any better. One of the things I was really stubborn about was that nobody in my first novel was young, rich, beautiful. MY reasons were – I was tired of reading a book or seeing a movie where everyone is young, rich, beautiful.
By the second draft, I’d pulled the descriptions of almost every one of my characters, except those where it seemed important to me. Lynch the killer has affectations – slightly long hair and VERY expensive European style suits. He also prefers to wear gloves when he kills someone. Not that he’s worried about being caught – he’s too high up in the Shadow Government to worry about that.
Then why?
He’d grown up watching movies where the killer always wore gloves.
Sarah, the book lover and Yossi, the chassid both get descriptions. Yossi is tall, over six feet, and very thin. Sarah is petite, small. Why give them descriptions? Because the incongruousness of the tall chassid with a beard and the short woman gives the reader an affection for both of them. Yossi’s not a strapping guy, he’s not a powerhouse who can punch your lights out. Gawky is the better word. Sarah gravitates to Yossi because he’s kind and quirky, and more than a little funny. The reader knows who they are and can gain affection for both.
What’s Controller look like? No details at all, except for gray hair at his temples. The Man with the Cane is overweight. That’s all you know. I’ll tip you with a secret not in the books – he’s balding and has a mustache. His hair is snow white.
Those details are not present in the novels.
Why?
No reason for them.
Unless you have specific reasons to give someone a description, the answer is don’t. Let the reader supply their own description. One author says that readers tend to supply a mental image of themself while they read. I must be strange, because I don’t do that. I can tell you what Paul Atreides looks like, because I’ve seen him in my head.
I can tell you what Frodo looks like, from reading LOTR since long before the movies. And I can tell you they absolutely nailed Frodo, Gandalf, Aragorn, Gimli, Legolas, Boromir, Merry, Pippin and Sam. Gollum a little different than how I saw him.
Tolkien gave little description of his characters. I mentally supplied all of them.
That’s why. Unless it’s important to explain their appearance, don’t. Let the reader supply them.
