I keep reading other writers say, “Don’t use on the nose dialog.” I’ve taken seminars on “The psychology of subtext”, and essentially the seminars say the same thing. Say it in subtext, without using the actual words.
Without telling me exactly how to do this, the advice is useless. How exactly do you write dialog that says one thing but means another? If left to this, it would seem we can spend weeks just on how someone says, “I’m angry with you.”
Well, write it this way.
HE walks to the fridge, not looking at HER. She sits at the table, drinking coffee. He opens the fridge door, peers in so he doesn’t have to look at her. She stares off into the distance as if he’s not there.
He
We’re out of milk.
She sips her coffee, and sets it down. The coffee is light in color.
He slams the fridge door.
He
I’m going out. To get milk.
He slams the kitchen door behind him.
She
Bye.
The scene shows a great deal. She got up before he did. Neither of them look at one another. He only stops to say something accusative. She seems to ignore him, but in response to his anger, she sets the coffee down, and… she used up the last of the milk for her coffee, out of spite. His statement is a threat to leave, but we see from his words he’ll be back.
Her response is chilling – she doesn’t care.
There you go. An entire relationship’s history in one scene and three lines of dialog.
And not one word of it dealt with the relationship on the surface.
